Self-care. Why is it so very important?

When you hear the word “self-care”, what comes to mind? Does just hearing the word stress you out? Do you feel confused as to what it even means? Sure, sometimes self-care can be getting a massage and treating yourself to dessert, but it is so much more. Self-care is anything that we intentionally do in order to take care of our mental, physical, and emotional health. The word intentional is an important component because it is the act of consciously taking the time to meet our own needs.

What self-care is and what it isn’t

There are many reasons why therapists stress the importance of self-care. For starters, it is important for every single one of us to recognize how to take care of our overall well-being. Our culture tends to be fast-paced and we don’t usually take the time to truly slow down and check in with ourselves on a daily basis. We typically don’t think about how we can take care of ourselves unless we’ve reached a point where we are physically, mentally, or emotionally drained. While self-care does not guarantee that you won’t have those days where you feel exhausted in more ways than one, it can reduce the number and decrease the intensity of these times. Self-care is an act of kindness towards yourself. Before we dive into how we can practice self-care, let’s take a moment to talk about what self-care isn’t.

First, self-care isn’t selfish. We live in society where we tend to neglect our own needs out of fear that others will perceive us as selfish for taking time for ourselves. You may be someone who constantly gives your time, your energy, or your attention to others. Maybe you’ve heard the phrase “You can’t pour from an empty cup”. It’s absolutely true! If we don’t take the time to replenish, refill, or restore, then we will find ourselves exhausted and burned out. This not only affects you, but others in your life as well.

Another misconception is that self-care has to be an elaborate or expensive activity, such as a spa day. This is so far from the truth! While getting a massage or having a day to pamper yourself could be a part of your self-care routine, it doesn’t have to be. Self-care can actually be really simple and inexpensive, which makes it doable for us all.

Getting started

Now that we’ve talked about what self-care means and what it isn’t, let’s look at some ways you can realistically incorporate self-care into your day-to-day routine. If you’ve never given much thought as to how to you can practice self-care, it might be intimidating and slightly overwhelming at first. But let me reassure you that every new habit takes time and practice, and self-care will provide relief, not add stress. Think of practicing self-care as bringing awareness into your life by consciously making the choice to meet your own needs.

There is no “one size fits all” when it comes to self-care. The beauty of self-care is that you can personalize it to meet your needs in the moment! Asking yourself, “What can I do for myself right now?” is a great way to get in touch with what your body or mind needs. We often neglect our own needs in order to give to others, because we’re conditioned to think that we can only do one or the other. I’m here to remind you that you can “both/and”, meaning you can both take care of yourself and take care of others.

I encourage you to start by writing down any activities that you like to do (i.e., hiking, cooking, taking a hot bath, etc.). From this list, I want you to think about if and how these activities can help your mental, emotional, or physical health. For example, maybe you wrote down that you enjoy spending time with friends and you’ve noticed that you feel recharged after experiencing quality time with friends! Simple activities like this can help you feel better. Or maybe you prefer alone time, so being around others might actually drain your energy levels.

Get creative with your list and write it down so that you can refer to it when you need some “you” time. If you’re feeling stuck, don’t worry. Here are some ideas to get your creative juices flowing:

• Journaling • Calling a loved one • Taking a bath • Drawing/painting/coloring

• Playing or listening to music • Going on a trip • Taking a leisurely walk • Exercising

• Reading a book • Practicing yoga • Meditating • Praying • Accessing therapy

• Spending time in nature • Going to a religious service

3 Fundamental parts of self-care

Whatever is on your personal list of self-care activities, be sure to address these three areas as part of your self-care plan.

Sleep

Prioritizing sleep can sometimes be the most beneficial act of self-care! Taking care of our basic needs, like getting enough sleep, is an easy act of self-care we can give ourselves. Try setting an alarm thirty minutes before your bedtime to remind you to prepare for sleep. Make your nighttime routine one where you can really unwind from the day (i.e., dim the lights, light a candle, read a book, journal, put on comfy pajamas) You get the idea. And yes, 7-9 hours is A MUST. To learn more about why sleep is so important, check out my more detailed blog post The Importance of Sleep.

What you eat

Now I’m not one to promote a certain diet or lifestyle when it comes to food, but I do encourage you to view the food that you eat as nourishment. If we constantly eat sugary or fried food, then we aren’t going to feel our best. Healthy food can fuel your body for the day and still provide comfort and tasty nourishment. But if occasionally you really want to eat that pint of ice cream, treat yourself and go for it! Jeni’s is always stocked in my freezer.

Getting outside

Sunshine provides vitamin D which has lots of benefits for your physical and mental health! Sure, you can take vitamin supplements, but getting outside and enjoying nature can be beneficial in more ways than one. Even if only for 10 minutes, it’s still something you are choosing to do for yourself and can break up your stressful day. You could go on a walk to get your body moving, or you could sit outside and read a book as you soak in the sun. Sometimes just changing your environment can help alleviate stress. Plus, given this season of quarantining, getting outside is more valuable than ever!

I want to encourage you to take time to think about and write down your own self-care plan. Take time for yourself! You’ll be amazed how much better you’ll feel by intentionally looking out for yourself.